[RE] AFFIRMATION

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I used to believe in the existence of angels.

The thought of winged, person-like creatures roaming around to safeguard us from evil was just irresistible. The image of a man, or a woman, clad in flowing white with flapping, majestic wings, ready to save us from any kind of wickedness, was my blanket of security. The mere thought comes in inevitably during moments of fear and distress. And almost surely, when moments like these arise, I see my own "guardian" fending off the vile---which used to be my childhood enemies, those cumbersome bullies.

Until such a time when I had my first moment of real embarrassment in front of the girl in pigtails whom I adored so much. The increased level of consciousness decreased my perception of angels with majestic wings. I thought that this was the effect of increased homework, increased activity, increased responsibility, and I thought right. I no longer saw the guardians fending off my self-made enemies.

Except for a time when I was almost hit by a speeding truck. I saw a winged being swoop down toward me, from nowhere. Naturally, I stood frozen on my tracks marveling at the sight. Later, I realized that I could have died had I taken a single step.

Time passed and I forgot about the hovering, winged being.

I was resigned to the fact that angels do not show themselves to human beings. Or at least, they do not show themselves as flying men and women in flowing white robes, with golden hair and golden trumpets. I was content to admit that if angels indeed thrived on Earth, then the wicked that permeated from the bowels of humanity would never exist---that nothing untoward, inherently evil would ever happen.

I was resigned to the fact that logic explained all that needs explaining. I was resigned to logic and its absolute value. I believed in logic.

And logic tells me to never believe in flying women in white robes.

Until that DAY. And the day that followed. And the day that followed, again.

In the deepest recesses of my mind, a tinge of doubt stirred---a stir that created ripples through my entire system.

I was in a pinch, was distressed and at loss for action. I was in a great deal of pain and doubt, of apprehension and uncertainty. Just like when I was faced with those cumbersome bullies.

And then, I saw you.

I found myself waiting---waiting for you to spread your wings. And lift me.

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